A Short Sociology on Postal Addresses

When I studied in Mary Mount School, our teachers exposed us to certain extra-curricular activities like subscription to magazines which catered to North-east teenagers/youth, Christian youth, Indian youth etc. Aside from their own material and content, these magazines and comics taught us colloquial English that textbooks do not offer. The teachers even provided us the opportunity to make foreign friends via International Youth Service, what we called Pen Pals those days. These days, all of us are Screen-Mates, it seems like. Facebook Friends and IG Followers, all of us.

In the 00s, Snail Mail was still popular. We knew our addresses because we kept writing them on envelopes. We bought stamps in bulk. We bought paper and other stationeries scented by potpourri. We received them constantly too. These days, all the stamp buying I do is for office dak.

How things change!

We lived in Armed Veng in the days of IYS Pen Pals. Esther Leihang, M40 Armed Veng, Aizawl 796001 was the address I scribbled at the “If Undelivered, please return to” space at the flipside of the envelopes I’d mail to Europe and America. I don’t know if all the letters were delivered; if they were undelivered, none of them ever returned to me. However, mails addressed to that address did find their ways to me. 

We talked about veng/locality names quite often in my friend circle. Sometimes I still think about them, especially when I move to a new town/village.

Take Electric Veng, for example. It is where I stay in Hnahthial. There is seemingly an Electric Veng in every slightly bigger town in Mizoram. Apt too because that would usually be the localities where the Power & Electric Dept. run their sub-offices.

Or Chanmari in almost every big town. That I figure would have been named for where people used to, you know, mar the chand. Hit the bullseye. Target practice places evolving to proper localities. 

Or an ITI Veng which would develop quite naturally around any place that has an ITI institution. Like a College Veng in many places as well. Or even a Sikul Veng (for older schools, perhaps?). 

My old locality as well. There are not that many Armed Vengs in Mizoram. I know of no other than the one in Aizawl. Armed Veng was named for the establishment of the 1st Batallion Mizoram Armed Police in the area. The Veng developed around it. Leitan, by contrast, appears to exist in other places as well, not just in Durtlang. Rock-cut areas for roads, you understand, literally lei tan.

This is the way many areas have developed – around an institution. Not just in Mizoram but even back in Delhi. INA Colony and Defence Colony come to mind.

It happens. 

Hermon, is another common name. It is also the Lane where we currently live in, within Leitan Veng. In many places it is the name of the Veng itself. As in Hermon Veng. A bit more Biblical. There are few Vengs like that. Bethlehem Veng, for instance. Or Peniel Veng.

There are a few Republic Vengs here and there. I wonder where that is from. Also the few scattered Nursery Vengs. Is Nursery here for kids’ education or plants? I don’t really know.

In Mizoram, other less creative but natural occurring common place names for localities would be your Vengsang, Venglai, Vengthlang areas. That would be Upper Area, Middle Area and Lower Area – where the town expanded. Very natural. Very easy to understand. In this way, you’d also have your Ramthar and Ramhlun, Vengthar and Venghlun – new areas and old areas. 

There are the Adjective variety as well. For instance, your many -kawn(s); you know, junctions. You’d have your Sikulpuikawn, Bungkawn, Bawngkawn, Serkawn, Ramrikawn – junctions named for identifying markers: Main School, Banyan (?), Cattle, Fruits, Border, what have you. There is a Kikawn in Lunglei; I have no idea what a Ki is.

For that matter, quite a few villages are named this way. After a brook, for example. Selesih and Kelsih come to mind. Brooks where mithuns and goats, respectively, drank? Maybe there are more -sih(s) I can’t remember presently.

There are also quite a few Zotlangs and Zonuams here and there. Go figure.

Addresses are quite interesting. It would be nice for a little Graduation thesis in Sociology. Maybe someone from MZU or College Level Sociology can pursue it for term paper and make a little Sociology of it. It should be interesting. Research on names of places. I’d read that.

Speaking of education again, schools have changed so much. I don’t even know the academic year anymore, leave alone syllabus. In all honesty, it has become harder for me to relate to teenagers today, my age finally catching up, as it must, as it happens to every well-adjusted human to their appropriate ages. I don’t know what ECA schools lay out for their kids. In the days of Facebook and Instagram, IYS Pen Pals are probably a thing of long ago. Snail Mail, as we called it. I had a few friends in Italy, USA and France. We’d send each other stickers, collected the stamps, exchanged pleasantries. At one point in college, I even reconnected to an old Italian friend in Orkut, though it did not last. We had become different people by then. 

I appreciate what the school did for me and all I learned from the ECAs of the more literary bent, for introvert kids like me. I wonder if they still do it, one way or the other.

Addicted

I have a personality wired for addiction. It manifests in obsessions as well, I believe. I have no proof of this, though. It’s just a hypothesis I am working with. All I know if whatever I do or feel, I go at it hard.

There was a time when I was preparing for Civils and I was highly addicted to the sweet dye-red mango jams packed in tiny little poly-bags that we get in Mizoram from Burma. The ones that have a turtle on its little pocket. Usually we call it Hai-Um. Jams? Pickles? Pickled mango, maybe. I have no idea where the turtle on the packet cover was heading, but my sister supplied me with about a 100 bucks worth of them about 3x a week. My tongue was always red.

I got the job and then a year later I moved to Faridabad to do my MBA under a government programme. I’d stay the week in Faridabad and return to my dad’s quarters in West Kidwai Nagar for the weekend. WKN was next door to INA Market where they sold local-made yam chips. I devoured them. I bought them by the kilo. I had a salary by then. And being no real big spender, I threw it on chips. My metabolism what it was at the time, it didn’t show on my body but man, I ate yam chips like there was no tomorrow.

Momos I won’t even mention. I ate momos like God designed them to be my main source of sustenance. I have never really stopped. But I don’t eat momos like I used to. Majnu ka Tila, Amar Colony, and Lajpat Nagar momos were where all my student pocket money went. 

I returned to Mizoram and got posted in Champhai and living alone, and salaried, I began to fixate on sunflower seeds. Dear lord, how I consumed sunflower seeds! Most people share a 20 bucks packet together over a chat. I usually ate a 100 bucks worth in one sitting, watching a movie maybe. The speed and accuracy of my shelling skills became legendary. They are still quite something to behold, if I do say so myself.

That gave way to cheese wafers by Nabati. As with the sunflower seeds, I got them in bulk from the wholesalers rather than buying retail because the amount I was consuming, it did not make sense to buy retail. I saved 10 or 20 bucks here and there buying wholesale. But more importantly, it saved me the mortification I’d feel from the judgment based on my greed and gluttony over these snacks, which I could not truly fault. That, however, stopped one day when I was happily buying Nabati in bulk when the innocent woman wholesaler marveled: Wow, how do you sell them so quickly, it is very impressive! I was properly shamed because not one of those wafers had ever been sold or shared. I’d eaten them all. I have not eaten Nabati wafers since.

When I was in Aibawk, one time a doctor told me to cut off potatoes and flour from my diet. Suitably scared, I started looking for substitutes for potato and maida snacks. I tried these really umami packed peas but they came in really tiny air-filled packets. I didn’t feel good buying them in bulk. They were too conspicuous. So I started eating Kurkure. I figured as this was corn-based, it was some sort of a legit loophole snacks deal. I ate Kurkure like my life depended on it. I got them from RPi who runs a petty shop and she could never stock them fast enough because I ate them all. The only thing I was ever hesitant about Kurkure was that when I was in college, U Sangpuii had needed to get her stomach pumped after consuming too much Kurkure at one go.

So I decided to switch tracks and started eating cold sausages instead. RPi who was my dealer even warned me against it. These were not good snacks. They had too much MSG in them for that amazing umami flavour for them to ever be good for the body, per se. I didn’t care. They were really good snacks. I ate cold sausages till my sweat and pee started stinking of them. I knew I had to stop. The withdrawal was something awful.

I have been trying very hard to not feed into this obsessive nature. It always needs to be a very conscious effort because my god, it is easy to slip! I slipped in Hnahthial and started eating Kurkure again. My driver would buy them for me and at one point he bought 2000 bucks worth of Kurkure and he packed them in a giant cardboard box. And when Champhai was repeated with the shopkeeper asking him whether the DC Office was hosting some sort of kid-friendly programme, I was chastened and I knew I had to stop.

I believe that if I ever get addicted to booze, that'll be the end of me. I’d die in a month from alcohol poisoning. Or, to paraphrase Daniel Radcliffe, it could be hard drugs. So all things considered, things could be worse. I guess I am still fine.

Kumpui Sul A Lo Vei Chang Hian

Ka pi Santhiami leh ka pi Hauvi te kha an inkawm ngeih reuh khawp a. Lunglei Luangmual 2nd Bn MAP hmunah an rawn zin dun a. Thlasik zing kar nilum ai pahin Uipum tlang dung an en dun a, kan in unau ang ka ring, an han ti dun ṭhin a. Ka pa nu leh ka nu ni te an ni a, kan inah khan an rawn cham dun ṭhin a. Naupang ho an rawn awm ṭhin nge, ka hre chiah lo.

Gypsy-ah kan inhnawh khawma kan zin kual ṭhin lai chuan min zai pui ṭhin a. Ka pi Hauvi hian a khat tawkin “Pitar putar naupangte... kha sa leh ang u,” a ti a, hla a thlang a. Midang chuan U-A-Ma an tih hla kha. Hemi line hi naupang ho kan awm ṭeuh ṭhin vang kha a ni mai thei, a duh thei viau a. Ring deuh deuhin kan sa ṭhin. A hnu deuh lawkah keimah emaw Samuela emaw kan rui a, kan luak leh nge nge bawk a. Motor ruih hi zin hrehawmna ber a ni mai thei. Tarmit ka bun tak hnu khan ka rui chhunzawm ta miah lo bawk a, a va han lawmawm tak. Mi motor rui ka hmuh hian ka ngai lo.

I digress. What was I saying?

Ringtu Zawng Zawng Te U, tih ah kan awm tak e. Christmas lai ani mai thei thin an rawn zin/kan va lam ṭhin lai kha, kan sa nasa thei em mai.

Tun kum ang reng renga ka rilru a Christmas loh hi ka la hre ngai lo. Kum dangah chuan Christmas hi nuam ka tia, ka phur thei phian a. Tun kum chu Santa Claus aiin The Grinch ka hnaih zawk tlat. 22nd December ah pawh ka Christmas Spirit thei bar lo chu a ni.

Chuti chung chuan zinkawngah tal Christmas Carols ka la play ve ṭang ṭang a. Christmas hla hi an mak khawp a. Kum tluanin kan sa lo vang vang a. A hun a lo thlen hi chuan lyrics en ngai lova sak pui theih hi an lo ni ve leh zel. Kan memory hi a lo ṭha awm ngawt mai. Kan hria tih pawh kan hriat tawh loh te pawh hi ISIS Sleeper Cell ang deuh hian a hun taka kaihthawha activate theih nghal hi a dang pawh kan thluak hian a neih ka ring. Mi hming te hi ni ṭhin se a tha tur hi a nia. An hmel ka hriat si, an hming ka hriat tak miah loh te nena in mawl biak tawp chang a tam. A zia lo hret ṭhin.

Mahse 2018 Inthlanpui buai rum rum laia kan senior pakhat sawi ṭhin ang deuh a nia. “Esi, ti hian hun hi a kal ang a, a zo ve leh mai ang,” a ti ban charh charh zel a. A dik phian. Lalsangzuali Sailo te hla ang kha ania, kumhlui mual liam tur auh din theih ni hek lo, a kal ve zel a. Hun hi a liam ve mai zel a. Hunin hun hrehawm te a tihdam phei chu ka hre lo a, a liam thuah hi chuan a liampui ve zel a. A liam ve leh mai ang, tih mai hi a lo ṭha ta mai.

This too shall pass. C’est la vie!

Eng hun mah hi a lo rei tak tak lo. Hriat loh karah kan lo puitling a. Kan upa ve zel a, kan nu leh pa te pawh tar lam te an lo pan a. Mavena ringawt pawh thla sarih ka kawl hnu chuan kut khingkhat in ka chelh zo ta reng reng lo. Einstein-a theory of relativity fiamthua an sawi ang deuh ani, a tawngtu a zir hian hun hi a lo reiin a lo rei lo mai hi a lo nia. 

Kan nghah hun te a lo thleng a. Ni thei lo anga kan ngaih te a lo thleng bawk a. Ni thei tura ngaihruat nachang kan hriat loh te pawh a lo thleng a. Ecclesiastical takin kan hun hman dan kan ngaihdana kan fimkhur hi a lo pawimawh ber zel chu a nih hi. Midang vei hman pawh hi a lo ni tak tak lo.

Feliz navidad!

Dan Hriat/Loh

Dan hriat loh hi chhuanlam a tling lo, tih hi Dan Thupui pakhat a ni bur mai a. Dead ve fu a ni. 

Sociologist ka ni a, Lady Shri Ram leh JNU ah te Sociology ka zir thin a. Sociology ah chuan Sual hi Dan lampang aṭang ni lovin society/khawtlang zawkin engtin nge Sual a ngaih tih philosophy hi kan tui pui ṭhin a.

Crime is that which offends the sensibilities of the society, tih hi Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell, tih tluk zeta College atanga ka by-heart a nih phah a ni. 

Crime discussion ah hian interesting deuh chu Dan leh Khawtlangin Sual a thliar dan hi a in ang lo ve fo a. Thil lian tham – human trafficking, drug smuggling etc. ah hi chuan Khawtlang leh Dan pawh a inkalh lo a, an thu a rual khawp a. 

Thil lian tham ni lem lo, Dan pawi sawi si lo, Society pawi sawi si a lo awm thung a. Example awlsam ber pawh Incheina hi a ni ang. Engemaw laia emo culture hluar em em lai te, tunhnaia Korean culture lar leh te, heng popstars/actors te inchei dan anga tleirawlte an inchei hian Dan chu an bawhchhe lo, mahse khawtlang ṭhenkhat mit chu an ti kham a, pawi tlem chu a sawi ve det chu a ni. 

Sual han tih pawp rau rau pawh hi a thlirna – a Point of View – kan en a ngai a. Sakhuana lamah Christianity nen sawi zawm chuan Crime leh Sin an lo awm a. Entirnan “Awhna Sual” te kan ti a. Christian mit aṭang chuan Sin a ni a, Dan mit atang chuan a lo ni ve lem lo a. Chutih laiin Tualthahna te chu sakhaw dan aṭang leh Dan mit atang pawhin Sual a lo ni ve ve a. 

Mihring inthahna te pawh a chang chuan debate chiam a lo la ngai a – tunge tual thattu, tunge a thah, eng vanga that nge a nih, tih te a zir hian a la debate theih cheu ṭhin a. Female Foeticide te society leh sakhua chuan a pawm, mahse Dan in a pawm lo. Self-defense lamah thah tuma min bei tu laka kan lo invenna lamah kan lo that palh anih chuan Dan leh Society chuan thiam min chan tir mai thei; sakhuana in enge a sawi tih chu a sakhua a zir te a lo ni leh ang a. Indona ah ram tan mi kan that a, ram tan kan thi a; Sual a ni em? 

Dan Mit te kan han ti ṭhin a. Justice is Blind, kan ti bawk a. Dik taka Rorelna chu a mit a del a ni. Art ah Lady Justice lem (a lim te pawh a niang chu) kan hmu ṭhin ang a, bukna a keng a, a in buk tawk a, a mit erawh chu a tuam ani. He art hi ka ngaina khawp mai a. Rorelna Dik kenkawh dawn chuan tu chungah nge ro ka rel, tih hriat loh hi a lo him a. Mihring ve tho kan ni a, familial leh social circles kan nei ve a. Kan personal relationship te office/professional life ah ken luh a mawi lo te, a thiang lo te, a lo awm a. Eng chen hi nge “kan in support” kan tih hian a huam, tih te pawh kan in zawh ṭhin a ngai. Theih chin chinah chuan Dan a dik taka kenkawh hi kan tum a, kan ti tur a ni.

Chumi ti thei tur chuan Dan kan hriat a ngai a. Ril taka kan hriat loh pawhin a tlangpui hriat hi a ṭul a ni. Sorkar hnathawk kan nih phei chuan department aiawh, department hmel lanna te kan lo ni a. Keimahni kaltlangin sorkar-in hna a thawk a, sorkar hmel lanna kan ni bawk a. Hetih vang hian a ai kan awh (sorkar) leh kan thawh sak te (mipuite) tan dikna kan duh a, Dan kan zawh ṭhat hi a pawimawh a. Sorkar office kan enkawl a, kan office zahawmna humhim leh a dikna hauhsak hi kan tih tur a ni a. Kan hnuaiah staff te kan nei a, an welfare te pawh kan ngaihtuah sak a ngai a. Hetiang zawng zawngah hian “hman aṭanga kan tih dan thin,” ti ngawt lova Dan awm sa leh Dan Thar te kan hriat te pawh a ṭul a.

Kan khawpui lehkhathiam ṭhenkhatte hi an biak tlak loh, kan ti ṭhin a. Underground sipai tih pawha leihnuaia awm tak tak anga lo ngai BA Political Science te an lo awm leh nawlh ṭhin bawk vei nen. Thingtlang lehzualah phei chuan, lehkhathiam loh chhuanlam tel bawk nen, khaw hawi hi a zim duh khawp mai a. Mi in an tana ṭha tur te, an chanvo ngei ngei te, an lo hre lo a. An hriat reng pawh an lo ban ngam lo fo mai a. Public servant, sorkar thu leh hla man thiam leh hre phak, te hian mawhphurna kan nei sang a ni.

Dan hi kan hriat a ngai, tih hi kan hre chiang tawk lo mai thei. Thil Sual kan tihin “Ka lo hre lo a,” tih kha chhuanlam a tling tlat lo. Mahse engtin nge India ram Dan ngah lutuk mai Dan zawng zawng hi kan hriat kim theih ang? A theih loh. Judge leh Ukil ho pawhin an hre vek seng lo. Mahse “dan hriat loh hi chhuanlam a tling lo,” tih a nih si bau si chuan kan nun min nghawng thei Dan tal chu kan ngaihven a kan hriat ve a ngai a ni. Lirthei ka khalh a, lirthei neih ka tum chuan Traffic Rules te, lirthei lampang Dan te ka in zir a ṭul. Maw!

Dan hriat hian kan tha a ti chak a. Inrintawkna min siam a. Tu in emaw Dan kalha kan chunga an chet hunah Dan min humhimtu kan hriat hian huaisenna min pe a. Kan hnathawhsak mipuite, an hriat loh kan hriatsak a thurawn kan pek te, hma kan lak sak theih na a lo ni a. A ngai a ni.

Tunlaiah mi kan titi dan a dang tawh a. Hmaichhana titi a, topic han discuss tlan a, han zir ho te hi a old-fashioned ta riau a. Social Media a kan platform ah te social leh legal rules ten min phuar ve ta lem lo anga ngaihna kan nei ta lehnghal a. Thu chiang lem lo pawh kan sawi huai angreng a. Internet a kan post te hi nuai reh ve theih an ni ve ta si lo nen tlem chuan kan khawvel hmachhawn dan pawh kan thlak a ngai tawh a ni. A hman hmanin defamation case ka file mai tur ania tih leh FIR file rawh tih leh Side B tih reng pawh hi ṭawng tladah ang deuhah ka ngai a. Hre ve zul si, biak tlaka hre leh si lo te ṭawngkam a ni duh riau.

Hetiang ah hian Dan kan hriat a ṭul. Lo in zir ru aw.

NB: Vawiin 11th Dec., 2025 hian Legal Awareness campaign kan nei a. A vawi khatna atan Keynote Address ka pe a. Nilengin thusawi ka ngaithla a, ngaihdan te te ka lo siam a, zawhna ka zawt a, ngaihnawm ka ti phian a, phek 11 note ka ziak chhuak a, ka hlawk pui hle. ATI leh Mizoram State Legal Services Authority te chungah ka lawm hle a, thubuai in neih chuan Lok Adalat pan rawh u, tih tê mai hi ka lo advise che u bawk e. It’s free anyway.

The Andy God

God’s first name was Andy, as per an old joke I came across one time, probably in Roorkee, where a kid thought that because of the song he often hears and sings which goes:

Andy walks with me

Andy talks with me

Andy tells me I am his own…

Which of course, was a mishearing of the hymn In The Garden which actually goes:

And He walks with me

And He talks with me

And He tells me I am his own…

Misheard song lyrics are mostly always funny. There’s a thin white dude on Instagram who puts on a wig, takes up a hairbrush, and makes reels on misheard lyrics. I forget his IG handle. I particularly love the ones where Lorraine is involved… like “Have you ever seen Lorraine… coming down on a sunny day?” or “I can see clearly now Lorraine is gone” or “I bless Lorraine down in Africa!” High-la-ree-ous.

Speaking of the Gram, going off on a tangent, all these made me think about how it’s insane the way people misread lives. Social media gives everyone who has the time and inclination a free platform. Somehow it has fed so enthusiastically into our narcissism. One, we begin to think we have way more influence than we actually do because of online interactions – our Likes and Comments. Two, because of the same interactions, we begin to think people care about and notice us more than they actually do. And three, unfortunately, we seem to think we know people because of the content they choose to put online.

Social media platforms are designed to be visual, virtual and carefully curated. There are some people who dump 42 near similar photos in one post but those are usually only unclejis and auntiejis. Most of us rethink, clip, pull, tug, filter and enhance our photos, videos and words online. No one knows better than we do that The Us online is not The Us offline. Yet we think we know people based solely on their online content. Why? I don’t know. Maybe social media also makes us more myopic and self-centred yet audaciously confident than ever before.

Society has always put people in boxes. Or tried to put people in boxes. Even some sociologists I know who would fight you over how they do not do this, in fact, do. Human beings wear many faces. Some people wear more faces than others. Not even for malicious or sad reasons. Sometimes, masks are simply necessary. Because they make social interactions possible. And sometimes certain faces are the only ways that the other person will be able to understand them.

One day when the wearer decides that the masks are getting too heavy and they take it off, the audience gasps. Why do we never accept that we don’t know people as well as we think we do? Especially based off of social media content. Or based off of situations far removed from their natural habitat, like on vacations, or church, or professional environments, which demand very specific sets of masks.

So confident to think we know God’s first name because we’ve sung this song for forever. Never knowing or conceiving of the possibility that we might have misheard a hymn. 

Crazy. No?

There are other variants of the God joke. Another favourite of mine is where Forrest Gump goes to heaven and St Peter asked him what God’s name was. And he replied “Howard/Harold” because of the line “Our Father in Heaven, Howard/Harold be thy name…” 

I just thought of the Andy one because Jim Reeves’ version of the hymn is amazingly soothing to listen to, especially on an empty country road, as the sun sets in the west, when you’re feeling down and low, because you’re missing your family and friends, because you’re moving further away from home for the umpteenth time, unhappy and melancholy, to a village where you have no real friends, and God is your only solace.

The Middleton-Markle Of It All

I am waiting for 4PM today so let’s talk.

I saw an IG post this morning that said: Why is Meghan Markle always trying to copy Princess Diana? Why is she trying to project herself as the next Lady Di? Look at her wearing the same clothes, posing the same way, she thinks she can look like her et ce te ra.

Meanwhile, it has always been said: Kate Middleton/Princess Catherine pays lovely tribute to late MIL Princess Diana by dressing like her! She is channelling her late MIL. Kate Middleton looks beautiful dressing as Lady Di, wearing the same jewelry. And so on.

And I find myself marvelling at how the same things can be said in such different ways.

I’ve always said the offensiveness of a stare is inversely proportional to the cuteness of the starer. There is an entire HIMYM episode where they proposed a Dobler-Dahmer theory as well, Dobler from Say Anything with the boom box, and Dahmer, as in you know, the serial killer. If attraction is reciprocated, or at least the demonstrator of a gesture is cute, big romantic gestures are charming. If not, however, well, things gets definitely icky or worse, outright scary. I remember getting a single red rose from a stalker one time and well how I remember the way the flower made me shake from outright fear. Meanwhile, bouquets from most people have definitely been accepted with warmth and joy.

It is the vibe, I guess.

If you don’t like someone, it does not matter what they do. You will hate it anyway and find reasons why the gesture is off. If you like someone, you will find yourself making excuses even if they gaslight you and you can even recognise the pattern. 

Anyway, returning to the British RF, my take in all of it is: why are all the DILs trying to look like their MIL? No, wait. Their dead MIL btw who they never even met?! Do their husbands like it? I mean do the sons of the late Princess like it when their wives dress up like their mother? What weird royal oedipal/electra complex is this?! 

Or is it for the public eye? Which makes it very performative and icky. 

Personally, I think Kate Middleton tries harder to look like Princess Diana and/or try to channel her. I mean this is understandable because she has more to lose, and as the current Princess of Wales, the stakes are definitely higher for her. Meghan Markle, however cringe she sometimes come off as, has a CV in her kitty; she has done things with her life and can stand alone without the crutch of the BRF. But, you know, unfair on both. Comparison is the thief of joy, and the women have always been pitted against each other from Day One.

It is often said the British public and press have been terribly racist towards Markle. I saw an interview of hers where she admits to never having had this experience because she is so fair and has always been white-passing. But that clearly, that has not been enough for the BRF and their fanclub. If that is true, it is terribly unfair, I’d say. People also say she took her husband away from his family. Man’s a grown up, dude. And every single functional family I know – even in Mizoram, ffs – encourage non-heirs to move out of the family house to keep peace in the household because no matter how rich or hoity-toity you are, joint households and two “matriarchs” sharing a kitchen is just a spell for disaster. 

Also it is possible that the two ladies never even try to "copy" Diana but when someone gets photographed that much (for all three) it is possible they end up wearing similar things! There’s only a finite amount of fashion, especially for their uppity circles, the colours they can wear, the style and length of hem they can play with and all that. Especially for Middleton who as Princess of Wales, again, the style she can wear is just limited. And there is certain symbolic merit and ceremony to wearing Diana’s jewels. In which case it is even weirder for the media, social or otherwise, to project this oedipal complex on them no?

Just very off.

I think it is easier to pretend the British RF are secretly lupine, as Doctor Who suggests. On a tangent, I also find this one anecdote very amusing that I heard a time ago. That the late Queen Elizabeth II did not take very well to the late Princess Diana who quipped that she was more English than they were, even had more English royal blood. Which is true because the present BRF line is German, so the Spencer family really does have more English in them than the BRF. Brings to mind how apt Elton John’s Candle in the Wind rendition for Princess Diana was, no?

I realise I didn’t say anything but beat around many bushes. I am a sociologist. I am vague. I engage in tautological discussions. So sue me.

People When They Whelm

People be people. They just be.

Over the years, I have had cause to feel very many different things for people and because of people. The other day as I was walking my dog, I thought that it might be good to reflect on the disappointments.

Not the outright anger and all that. Those are righteous. Some people are horrible and you hate them. In no situation could they have been salvaged. Narcissists, mostly. But some are just mildly disappointing because they could have been better.

Let me explain.

My knowledge of work is limited to Sarkari jobs. My dad worked a Sarkari job. My mum worked a Sarkari job. I entered government service myself aged twenty-six. It’s all I’ve ever known. All I know about jobs is Sarkari. 

Sometimes I ask my sister what her job is like. I think she gets confused because I seem nosey. And it has never really occurred to me to explain to her why I am asking her about her job.

So I asked my friend Atu what her job is like. I ask her what our other friends do. After some point she said: Esther I think most jobs are admin and business. I think I annoyed her. But I also think she’s probably right. 

And this is just the organized sector.

I’m mentioning this because I meet people all the time who seem to think they know how to do my job. They don’t. You can know 70-80% of a job if you’ve held it too at some point in your life. But even then, there are factors like time, place, people, government… variables that change entire equations. You cannot cross the same river twice.

There is a quip in Mizo that says the best parenting is done/known by childless people. Which I feel is true. Not for the worth of the words but the weight of sarcasm. 

You can know of certain jobs and what they might entail. Especially when it comes to someone doing it wrong, it is so easy to announce exactly what had not been done right. Or at least that the job had not been done properly. Hindsight is 20/20, as the Americans say. Very easy to even suggest ways – however wrong and/or inapplicable – to solve problems. But the truth is that unless you’re on the desk, signing off documents that can condemn you to kingdom come, you have no idea what it takes to hold down a job and/or run an office.

My point being that you can walk a mile in someone’s shoes and still only begin to understand what they might be going through. Even twins in the same household have different lives. Presuming to think you can do a better job than someone who’s already doing their job is high-level pride and mind-boggling narcissism, sprinkled with a generous helping of stupidity. 

Yes, people holding public office or highly visible celebrities have a certain degree of accountability and responsibility to the public, legally binding accountability for the former, in fact. But aside from that, I believe it is misplaced entitlement to berate them for every single thing they do wrong. Unless they are doing more than 60% of the things wrong, shut up.

Also it is possible they just want to feck with you. Because they don’t like you.

So yes, while these people are not malicious and only just dumb, they are incredibly infuriating especially when you’ve been dealing with some frustrating people for a long time on the daily.

You know the types. Like the people who just prefer to hear opinions in bass. They are disappointments in my soprano.

Then there are the people who cannot cut it, not because they can’t, but because they won’t learn. Unchecked stupidity annoys me like little else. People have different abilities and strengths but we can all learn. Some people just refuse to and spend endless Tuesdays in a string of Februarys making excuses. They will try to bullshit their way into the Pearly Gates too. I hope St Peter denies them entrance.

The list goes on. The liars, the deceivers, the two-faced-ers, the cut off the nose to spite the face-ers, the prefer pretty words to good work ones, the can’t-stand-by-their-words ones, the I am this but they do that ones… People just overwhelm you with their amazing and uncanny knack to be just irritating. Or underwhelm you when you expect them to be something and they just fail to reach an ever-increasingly lower bar.

Sometimes, in a row of Thursdays without end, people just whelm.