Discovering Hell

It’s a good thing I’m not god or that I have any real powers because I very much doubt life would survive overmuch if I were. Free will, for sure, would not. It is a disturbing thought but if I am completely honest, I realise I would not be too opposed to autocracy if I were at the apex. The only thing that puts a pause in me being pro-dictatorship (even if the dictator would be me) is that I also firmly believe that the seed of destruction in any dictatorship lies in the system itself; that authoritarian rules cannot be absolute for long and from the very people being oppressed would be borne a saviour. Inevitable.

The other reason I would not make a very good god is that I am not that brilliant at handing out punishments. It is a sobering thought but I don’t often know people as well as I think I do. Which is very important if you are going to penalize someone because torture is a very strange concept and the same method often does not hold out universally. Even tolerance of pain is different across the multitudes. And of course, some people actively seek out thrill which others would call horror; kinks, as we say.

So what we call embarrassing or deeply terrifying sometimes do not have the same impact on other people. This makes certain prayers quite useless – or at least non-impactful. As in when you pray to god to maybe punish someone by dragging their names through the mud for, say, infidelity or monetary corruption. Clearly that infamy does not bother them because anyone who indulges in those things has already calculated the cost and has made their peace with the possible fallouts.

I’m Christian, so I am partial to: ‘As you sow, so shall you reap’, ‘Vengeance is mine, says the Lord’ and ‘There is nothing hidden that will not be revealed’ as I read them in the Bible. But that’s just a very lengthy, Abrahamic way of saying Karma. Anyhoo, because Karma sees all, Karma also judges all. And when she doles out her judgments, it is hardly ever in the way a mortal brain would expect but when you realise it, you think: of course, it could not have been any other way. Sometimes these penalties are deeply personal and/or incredibly secretive; sometimes all outward appearances would convince the world that sinners and criminals go about scot-free from their crimes because this is their world, but their lives are being eaten up from the inside and corroded from within.

It is hard to not wish harm on some people. Some people are just very disagreeable and generally overall non-likable. You want to maim them; not kill them, you understand, because of the moral implications of it and all the brevity of the retribution et cetera (read with eyeroll). Also if you indulge in these avenging business, Karma will have to sock it to you too and you don’t want to find out what kind of bitch-slap Karma has in reserve for you. In short, you never want to find out what hell is for you. So you do good. And take deep breaths. And hold your tongue. And all those things.

It’s a funny old world we live in. Sometimes I think heaven and hell are already here with us. (Also, sometimes I think it’s a bit like a multiverse, at the cost of sounding very MCU-y, but let’s leave that for another time.)