The Kingfisher

A can of Kingfisher appeared on the table in this one church Elder’s house one morning. This was a topic of hot but hushed conversation for some time among the children. Mostly: Whose Kingfisher is that? Why is it on dad’s table? Is anyone getting scolded for it? What is the game? Why is it out in the open? Should someone just claim it? And one of the most important Qs: Is it mine? Did he take it from my stock (but nothing else is missing)?

I remember cackling like a Disney witch the first time I heard this story. I also loved the lowkey manic anxiety that flavoured the discussion. Drama you’re not a part of is always fun and exciting. And so it was too with “The Tale of the Kingfisher”. No stakes, just fun. For me, at least.

In a land where beer is generally considered one of the various roots of all evil, it is not surprising that its sudden and mysterious appearance caused quite this stir. The father didn’t drink (or at least not in public, ever). The children “don’t” drink either (wink wink). So whose could it be? It was a wild mystery of unknown origins. Of course, everyone lowkey knew things. The father, for example, knew where that can came from. Obviously. The children knew it could only either have been purchased by the dad (from where? no we'll leave that for another day), or taken from one of their rooms. But it was common courtesy to acknowledge the fact that no one in this family drank alcohol (wink wink). So the beer sat on the table, and everyone tiptoed around it.

I’ve asked how this story ended, and I will tell you about it too. But not before I put in my two paise worth. 

I believe this is a nice parable for Mizoram today. Everyone knows what’s going on. But we just don’t want to expend energy into thinking about things. Leave alone do anything about it. Because delulu is comfortable, and as long as we are not starving yet, we can make things work. We can play the ostrich game. Besides, the Nile is just a river in Egypt, no?

Which is how today, we have begun to accept that “if the work is good, then it doesn’t matter who does it or how it gets done”. But I vehemently disagree. The ends do not justify the means. This is just a pretty lie we tell ourselves to justify our corrupt deeds. We can only reap the harvest that we sowed. What ends can we expect when the means was corrupt?

Because here’s the thing: we don’t always get tempted only with sex and drugs and alcohol. We sin differently. There’s gluttony, for example – “I’ll die before I go on a diet; you only want to be skinny, I want to be happy”. Or vanity – “I’ll take you down any way I can before you destroy my reputation”. Or coveting – “I don’t make as much money as you do, but I’ll be bankrupt before I allow my event to not be just as flashy as yours is”.

We simply do not get tempted the same way.

And the funny part – well, not funny haha, more like funny sad – is that as long as the Image is intact, most of us do our best to play along. We avoid confrontation and exposure. We choose to be sheeple. It’s easier. And possibly, much wiser as a course of social survival. So we condemn the sins we don’t get tempted by lest people see the sins we do get tempted by. The truth is that not many of us will be tempted to commit murder, for example. Or even with homosexuality which most of us are so willing to condemn loudly – as inherently heterosexual beings, we won’t get tempted by people of our own sex so this isn’t a “sin” we are likely to commit, hence we can safely condemn it. And I fear the worst of it is when we allow other people to do the dirty work for us and/or let them pay the price.

For our sins, we are forcing people further and further away from the straight and narrow. We need to remember that as nice as swimming in the Nile is, the Nile also has the world’s largest crocodile in it; crocodile so big the Bible calls it a dragon, in fact. We all need to do long Bible sessions on Matthew 18:6¹ and Romans 14:13². And read them as pertaining to us, for feck’s sake. Seriously, though. We really need to stop reading Bible verses and think OMG this is for my neighbour! No, sweetheart, this was for me. I am the one the verse is talking about. I am the one that needs to be better. I am the change that must first happen.

Of course, no. We shall focus instead on the can of beer on the table. But we will tiptoe around it and whisper amongst ourselves our various theories on it, maybe even weave rhapsody around it. But we won’t address the issue head on because that would mean bringing to the open something we all know, that all of us do drink. The illusion is nicer to maintain. 

Anyhoo. Around four days after the can mysteriously appeared on the dad’s table, causing plenty of hushed up conversations and discussions, one morning it vanished again. The discarded, empty, crushed up can was found in the trash bin that morning. Who drank it? It’s still a mystery.

The non-mystery mystery kinds, of course.

¹Matthew 18:6 If anyone causes one of these little ones—those who believe in me—to stumble, it would be better for them to have a large millstone hung around their neck and to be drowned in the depths of the sea.

²Romans 14:13 Therefore let us stop passing judgment on one another. Instead, make up your mind not to put any stumbling block or obstacle in the way of a brother or sister.