I am waiting for 4PM today so let’s talk.
I saw an IG post this morning that said: Why is Meghan Markle always trying to copy Princess Diana? Why is she trying to project herself as the next Lady Di? Look at her wearing the same clothes, posing the same way, she thinks she can look like her et ce te ra.
Meanwhile, it has always been said: Kate Middleton/Princess Catherine pays lovely tribute to late MIL Princess Diana by dressing like her! She is channelling her late MIL. Kate Middleton looks beautiful dressing as Lady Di, wearing the same jewelry. And so on.
And I find myself marvelling at how the same things can be said in such different ways.
I’ve always said the offensiveness of a stare is inversely proportional to the cuteness of the starer. There is an entire HIMYM episode where they proposed a Dobler-Dahmer theory as well, Dobler from Say Anything with the boom box, and Dahmer, as in you know, the serial killer. If attraction is reciprocated, or at least the demonstrator of a gesture is cute, big romantic gestures are charming. If not, however, well, things gets definitely icky or worse, outright scary. I remember getting a single red rose from a stalker one time and well how I remember the way the flower made me shake from outright fear. Meanwhile, bouquets from most people have definitely been accepted with warmth and joy.
It is the vibe, I guess.
If you don’t like someone, it does not matter what they do. You will hate it anyway and find reasons why the gesture is off. If you like someone, you will find yourself making excuses even if they gaslight you and you can even recognise the pattern.
Anyway, returning to the British RF, my take in all of it is: why are all the DILs trying to look like their MIL? No, wait. Their dead MIL btw who they never even met?! Do their husbands like it? I mean do the sons of the late Princess like it when their wives dress up like their mother? What weird royal oedipal/electra complex is this?!
Or is it for the public eye? Which makes it very performative and icky.
Personally, I think Kate Middleton tries harder to look like Princess Diana and/or try to channel her. I mean this is understandable because she has more to lose, and as the current Princess of Wales, the stakes are definitely higher for her. Meghan Markle, however cringe she sometimes come off as, has a CV in her kitty; she has done things with her life and can stand alone without the crutch of the BRF. But, you know, unfair on both. Comparison is the thief of joy, and the women have always been pitted against each other from Day One.
It is often said the British public and press have been terribly racist towards Markle. I saw an interview of hers where she admits to never having had this experience because she is so fair and has always been white-passing. But that clearly, that has not been enough for the BRF and their fanclub. If that is true, it is terribly unfair, I’d say. People also say she took her husband away from his family. Man’s a grown up, dude. And every single functional family I know – even in Mizoram, ffs – encourage non-heirs to move out of the family house to keep peace in the household because no matter how rich or hoity-toity you are, joint households and two “matriarchs” sharing a kitchen is just a spell for disaster.
Also it is possible that the two ladies never even try to "copy" Diana but when someone gets photographed that much (for all three) it is possible they end up wearing similar things! There’s only a finite amount of fashion, especially for their uppity circles, the colours they can wear, the style and length of hem they can play with and all that. Especially for Middleton who as Princess of Wales, again, the style she can wear is just limited. And there is certain symbolic merit and ceremony to wearing Diana’s jewels. In which case it is even weirder for the media, social or otherwise, to project this oedipal complex on them no?
Just very off.
I think it is easier to pretend the British RF are secretly lupine, as Doctor Who suggests. On a tangent, I also find this one anecdote very amusing that I heard a time ago. That the late Queen Elizabeth II did not take very well to the late Princess Diana who quipped that she was more English than they were, even had more English royal blood. Which is true because the present BRF line is German, so the Spencer family really does have more English in them than the BRF. Brings to mind how apt Elton John’s Candle in the Wind rendition for Princess Diana was, no?
I realise I didn’t say anything but beat around many bushes. I am a sociologist. I am vague. I engage in tautological discussions. So sue me.
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