Winning Metaphorical Cattle

I could be wildly wrong but I have long felt that “Ṭawngkam ṭha in sial a man” is less about sycophancy as it is about courtesy.

People like to sneer upon it, though. I have met people who think that this is an outdated and outmoded phrase. Well-placed words will win you cattle, I suppose. The phrase is from pre-money Mizoram economy so you replace what you need. The baseline is you choose your words properly, you gain favour.

This leads to people translating the phrase to mean chamcha giri. You fall all over yourself, kiss people’s ass and you get your job done. This is deplorable so I do understand when people sneer at this behaviour. You never want to meet, much less have to deal with, even less compete with, someone who does this.

And it is understandable in this light to then hate on this particular phrase. As long as you take it to mean that. But life is a curious little PR venture. You might have legal power, or money power, or muscle power, but sometimes all of that falls flat if you don’t have soft power. PR. This is when you realise that a little courtesy can go a long way. People are willing to go an extra mile for someone they like or respect. In the same way they are willing to risk censure for someone they loathe. 

And people can be, let’s put it this way, very creative.

A wise person understands that civility can calm temperamental people. That a show of gentility can make a person think more of you than you are. That, as with the Rings of Kula among Polynesian tribes, gift-giving is reciprocal, even when it is not commensurate. I believe in English, people say about gift: it is the thought that counts. All jokes aside, it really is. In an office, you are so very much more predisposed to move the file of someone you share kuhva with than someone who chide you for eating kuhva. It is what it is. If you’re smart about it, you accept it. Fighting this is not a hill you should fancy dying on.

Of course, there are always people who pervert this polite, dainty gesture to further their own causes. I have in my adult life realised that some people would not only do what it takes for them to survive, but also throw others, not just under the bus, but actively to the wolves, to ensure their own welfare. I find this despicable. But again, it is what it is. For them, the phrase is definitely about sycophancy. However, I would add that insincerity does not last. People usually recognise empty flattery for what it is, sooner or later. Besides, Karma will find them.

There is another phrase that comes to mind: “Mi kuta rul kaw zen”. I am not the best translator so I would just put it as attempts to reach into a snake’s burrow using someone else’s arm. It’s very straight-forward. Not much explanation needed in terms of advisory warnings. Basically, beware cowards.

And beware sycophants.

Funny thing is, they’re usually the same people.

Cowards are very dangerous people, come to think of it. Tivolians come to mind. Another topic for another day!